“Aaaaaaaanyway” Melony signaled her displeasure at my not taking the bait, “back to the gun thing. Because of the corporal punishment which was in place, nobody said anything about the pickup trucks with guns in them during hunting season. No kid was going to shoot up the school.”
She grew silent for a bit, closing her eyes. This girl was really fighting to stay awake. “Did you ever think the so called news outlets are really the world’s largest terrorist organization?” she asked sleepily. “I mean every one of them is owned or ran by elitist one percenters and they all have a gun control agenda.”
“Like I said, nobody around here cared much about guns. Everybody had a brain, even the clueless people had that much of a brain. Until the meth labs and such started moving in here I had never owned one. Now I own two, because an intruder will always search for the first one and if it is in its own case they won’t think to look for the second. No. I’m not going to tell you where they are. They exist for home defense. If someone breaks into this place while I’m asleep or my children are here, I don’t care if this place has a stand your ground law or not, I’m taking them out. I wasn’t the kind of person who would say that when I moved here. Thanks to Mitt Romney and Jamie Dimon this place became a crime infested shit hole so I had to buy guns and become that kind of person thanks to those fine upstanding biological fuck-ups.”
Melony was once again building steam. Hard to believe that having her eyes closed for less than three minutes could charger her batteries so well. The train is definitely coming down the mountain without any brakes.
“The news media has been pushing the anti-gun agenda since the elitists took it over. If the pro-choice Democrats would turn pro-gun no Republican would ever get elected again and the elitists would have to create a shiny new party after ninety percent of the country stopped listening to them. And guess what? Mass shootings would all but disappear.”
“How did we get from A to B?” I asked.
“The news media is the largest terrorist organization in the world. I firmly believe that now. Back in the early days of professional wrestling there was a phrase ‘red turns green.’ It meant if the arranged loser of a match would bleed on the mat they would earn more. The elitists who run these outlets and push this gun control agenda have created a profit generating machine with mass shooters, always hiding behind that tired ‘the people have a right to know’ expression.”
“Terrorist leaders promise their suicide bombers some number of virgins in the after life. Not one of them stops to think that they won’t have a body to enjoy them and the women are most likely virgins because they are fat and ugly with a nasty personality and severe hygiene problem. That explains why there are so few of them, because most people have enough common sense to think that much through.”